The Tudor, Pickering, Holt & Co. Securities Inc. research team has picked the pirates for this week’s edition of Friday Humor in their daily e-note. “Modern-day Jack Sparrow (OK, Captain Jack Sparrow)?” they ask. “It isn’t often that solid execution of a plan is a big negative, but this is a clear case of ‘dog catching car.’”

Earlier this week, Somali pirates hijacked a Saudi Arabian oil tanker offshore Kenya. The tanker contains some $100 million worth of crude oil, and the pirates want $25 million to release it.

In today’s global crisis, here’s something to rally around, and is easily understood. Pirates take things for keeps or for ransom. That’s what they do. There are no CDSs, mortgage-backed securities, TARPS and such to work it out. Want a supertanker? Here’s a supertanker, and give me $25 million. Simple.

The TPH team provide these potential headlines of the unfolding story: Somali Pirates Apply To Become Bank To Access TARP; Paulson: TARP Pirate Equity Is An ‘Investment,’ Will Pay Off; Kashkari Says ‘Somali Pirates Are ‘Fundamentally Sound;’ Moody’s Upgrades Somali Pirates To AAA; HUD Says Somali Dhow Foreclosure Program Had ‘Very Low’ Participation; Somali Pirates In Discussion To Acquire Citibank; and, lastly…Fed Officials: Aggressive Easing Would Cut Somali Pirate Risk.

The team opines, “Kudos to the pirates for thinking big…but demerits for thinking too big as this won’t end well.” Their investment rating for the Somali pirate business is Strong Sell.

–Nissa Darbonne, Executive Editor, Oil and Gas Investor, A&D Watch, Today,,;